Kathleen/22/Virginia

"She was tired of just existing; she wanted to live.”

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Today I don’t feel as sad anymore
I just want my best friend back…

For things to get better, to be like they used to be…

That’s all…

This is exactly how I feel:

I’ve been searching for an exit, but I’m lost inside my head;
Where I spend every waking moment wishing I was dead.
For a few minutes get me away from here,
For a few minutes wipe away my tears.
For I am lost right now as the ocean deep;
I am low my friend and how my heart does sink.
Yeah I am lost right now as the ocean deep;
I am low my friend and how my heart does sink.

It’s like there’s cancer in my blood,
It’s like there’s water in my lungs,
And I can’t take another step,
Please tell me I am not undone.
It’s like there’s fire in my skin
And I’m drowning from within -
I can’t take another breath,
Please tell me I am not undone.

I’ve been searching for an exit but I’m lost inside my head;
Where I spend every waking moment wishing this would end.
I can’t take another step, I cannot live inside my mind,
I can’t face another day, I am so fucking tired.
For I am lost right now as the ocean deep,
I am low my friend and how my heart does sink.
Yeah I am lost right now as the ocean deep,
I am low my friend and how my heart does sink.

It’s like there’s cancer in my blood,
It’s like there’s water in my lungs
And I can’t take another step -
Please tell me I am not undone.
It’s like there’s fire in my skin
And I’m drowning from within.
I can’t take another breath -
Please tell me I am not undone.

I’ve been searching for an exit but I’m lost inside my head;
Where I spend every waking moment, wishing I was dead.
I’ll take another step for you -
I’ll shed my tears until I drown, or until I am underground.
I’ll take another breath for you…
Will you still be there when I’m home, out from the great unknown?

It’s like there’s cancer in my blood,
It’s like there’s water in my lungs,
And I can’t take another step -
Please tell me I am not undone.
It’s like there’s fire in my skin
And I’m drowning from within.
I can’t take another breath -
Please tell me I am not undone.

The Amity Affliction - Pittsburg

Staring at the bottom of your glass
Hoping one day you’ll make a dream last
But dreams come slow and they go so fast

You see her when you close your eyes
Maybe one day you’ll understand why
Everything you touch surely dies

Staring at the ceiling in the dark
Same old empty feeling in your heart
Cause love comes slow and it goes so fast

Cause you only need the light when it’s burning low
Only miss the sun when it starts to snow
Only know you love her when you let her go

Only know you’ve been high when you’re feeling low
Only hate the road when you’re missin’ home
Only know you love her when you let her go

And you let her go

As the friendship goes resentment grows

But those are the days that bind us together, forever
And those little things define us forever, forever

All this bad blood here, won’t you let it dry?

Oh, you’ll be the end of me

I’m never happy like we were happy
I’m never sad like we were sad
Oh, you’ll be the end of me

You know me all too well
And I can’t suppress the memories
You’re gone and I can tell
That I’ve lost more than you’ll ever see

Don’t say that it’s not fair
That you’re not the person you wanna be
Cause oh, you’ll be the end of me

I know I wasn’t perfect, but I kept trying
Till I forgot why I stayed
Oh, you’ll be the end of me

Yeah we lost all meaning
We lost the magic
So good luck to you on your way
Oh, you’ll be the end of me

I ask myself everyday…

If I could find the words, if I could shake the world,
If I could turn back time would you still be there?
If I could find the words to say,
If I could shake the world to break you down,
Then would you still be there?

Would you still be there?

Dislocated, I lie awake
Suffocating in my mistakes.
I lost my halo when I fell from grace,
But maybe next time I won’t throw it all away.

There’s no dancing around it,
I crawl into the fire then fan the flames,
And I can’t stand it
And I can’t stand it
But I don’t have the strength to burn the page

In the wastelands of today

When there’s nothing left to lose
And and there’s nothing more to take
But you force yourself to choose

In the wastelands of today
When tomorrow disappears
When the future slips away
And your hope turns into fear

And your hope turns into fear

Tearing me apart with words you wouldn’t say, and suddenly tomorrow’s a moment washed away.

Cause I don’t have a reason, and you don’t have the time,
But we both keep on waiting for something we won’t find.

The light on the horizon was brighter yesterday,
With shadows floating over, the scars begin to fade.

We said it was forever but then it slipped away,
Standing at the end of the final masquerade.

Cause I can’t see forgiveness, and you can’t see the crime,
And we both keep on waiting for what we left behind.

I’m not okay…